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the last threads of the tapestry

January 9, 2011

My grandma is dying. It won’t be long now.

For many years my grandma has suffered from Alzheimer’s. For almost ten years now she has lived life from a wheelchair or a bed. She slowly lost the ability to recognize familiar faces, to communicate, to even move. 

And I don’t know why. I can’t, with my human mind, make sense of it. To be honest, it seems cruel. It seems like pointless suffering. Anyone who has suffered unexplainable loss, of any kind, for seemingly no reason can relate.

And I know now that it won’t make sense and it will seem cruel and pointless from my human point of view, until I realize that there is always more than one way to look at everything.

What my grandma is experiencing now is the last threads of the tapestry of her life being woven into place. Soon she will see what those left behind can’t (or what we glimpse “through a mirror dimly”) – that God uses every detail of our lives here on earth to prepare us for eternity.

That has sounded so nebulous and over-spiritual to me for so long. I haven’t really understood. And in a life full of so many things that will never be understood, I am grateful that I have finally begun to understand this.

Nothing God does is ever cruel. Nothing is ever pointless. All these years – I firmly believe – He has been at work in my grandma’s life and heart in powerful ways. Because she is His. And even though she has been laying motionless in a wheelchair for years on end, God has not been bound by that. And the outward appearance of her frail body is not a reflection of what He has been doing in her heart or the hearts of those touched by her life.

Doesn’t the Bible say our outward man is dying, but our inward man is being renewed day by day??? He has been preparing her for the day (so soon now) when she will enter eternity and really begin living.

She may have been motionless for years on end, but God hasn’t been motionless. He has steadily been weaving the tapestry of my grandma’s life. Even though it might not look like it to the human eye – where there is life and breath and spirit, nothing is ever pointless. There is always purpose.

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From → Personal

7 Comments
  1. Becky Roth permalink

    Beautiful.

  2. Christine permalink

    My dear Grandpa just passed away this past September, and the heartache is still fresh. I can very much relate to what you are going through right now. The waiting….knowing what is about to happen and dreading it, yet wanting the suffering to be over and him to be in glory with Jesus. I’ll be praying for you and your family.

    “Death leaves a heartache no one can heal,
    love leaves a memory no one can steal.”
    ~ from a headstone in Ireland

  3. this was beautiful Hannah. It was good for me to read. Britt’s grandparents are going through this and it was a wonderful reminder to me. It is so hard for us to see the reason or the picture but what God is doing is not always evident to us.

    Love you and your family and you are in my prayers!

  4. I am so sorry, Hannah. I am praying for you and your family!

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